Mummy said I could go =D At first she said no. And I'm like why?! She didn't like the idea of being away from me for 4 days. Hahaha. And its like the new year period and she gave me reasons like there would be activities or programmes at church. Like what can be more important than META?! NOTHING! LOL. Besides I got a subsidy of $90 *winks*. I didn't ask for it. Mylene said if money is an issue they can subsidize and after hearing the story that I have only $5, which is a true story, she said I could try to raise about $30-$40. And I'm like, cool =D I told her I'd do my best for $50. Haha! The more the merrier xD So this year, 28th-31st December, the slots in my calendar are taken for METAMORPHOSIS 2009 =D

Lessons are simply boring. Hais, but I have to listen, thought today I think I missed quite alot. LOL. Mum has set me conditions in order to go to META. And if I don't do well for my exams, then I can say goodbye to any other outing. Haha. But hey, I never don't do well for my exams =D I'm going to study now. LOL. Seeya

In His Love ♥,

Krishna Veni

Firstly, this goes out to my dearest PulKesh Kumar. I'm super sorry man! I'm sorry if I had said anything that pissed you off. Not much in a great mood that time. It sucks that I never see you online anymore. So afraid to even call you, afraid that you would ignore my call. Is there anything I can do to make you forgive me? I feel so guilty every time I see that key chain you sent me. ( I carry it with me all the time ) So basically, I always think of you! And I really hope you accept my apology. Sorry sorry sorry.

I don't really update my blog anymore because I don't think anyone reads it. At some point I think I share somewhat the same feelings one of my classmate feels. He thinks no one cares about him at all and it has been ages since we saw him in school. He happens to be the smart ones yeah! I started thinking a lot today. I had so many friends, friends who would stand up for me when people were mean to me. LOL. And when people tried to make fun of the slightest thing I did. Sometimes it can be funny, but sometimes it isn't. I think no one ever takes me seriously. The one person whom I shared so much with has started avoiding me. I'm not sure if its because of what I said, or because he simply doesn't come online.

Hectic times have already started. Christmas is coming. Time to make cookies, time to clean the house. And most importantly, church activities have started to weigh down on me. People at church just don't seem to co-operate with the programme and it gets on my nerve sometimes. And just when I feel like shouting, screaming and killing someone, I do the exact opposite. I just stay very very very quiet. A few people commented on this change of behavior. Yes it shows that I'm upset, but I convert it into something positive. You can't say I'm sensitive anymore. It's just that I choose to keep quiet to avoid saying the wrong things and hurt people. [ He who guards his lips guards his soul, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin (Pr. 13:3). ] So yeah, just zip it up.

God has been very amazing in my life. Even in the slightest issue. Example, it rained yesterday, my umbrella was wet, so I left it to dry. Forgot to fold it and keep it into my bag. This morning as I was leaving, I can swear, okay maybe not swear, but I can say that there was no wind, no one told me anything, and just like that my umbrella fell down onto the group. And it just hit me that I had to take it along. Sure enough it rained today =D Yes its a very small thing, and everyone would just say its coincidence, but it isn't. I'm sure.

I wanted to go to Metamorphosis Camp 09, 28th - 31st December. I knew there was no way I can raise $140 bucks. I knew I had many financial commitments, my insurance, church funds etc. And I told myself that this year, I'm just not going to go. Just not this year. Though I tried to put my faith in God, I just kept saying No, No No! And God says YES, YES, YES. I'm sure he wants me to go to the camp. I got a very impromptu call from Selina today and I met her and Mylene. I thought it was just casual chat, hi hello and catching up because its been 2 weeks since I went for PDA. And then they asked me why I couldn't go for META. I told them about Mummy not letting me go and a bit of the money issue as well. Am I damn pleased that the money issue is going to be sorted out! I get more time to save up, at least till META! And the rest of the money will be settled by the ministry. Aww. It really touched me how much these people tried to get me to go. I'm so sure it was God's plan. Even though Mummy has controlled my spending, I'm going to save as much as I can even if it means going without food for the next 6 weeks! And today, I'm going to talk to Mummy. I hope Mummy says YES! Oh META, here I come =D

I need to take a nap! Dead tired =D

I miss you PK =D

In His Love ♥,

Krishna Veni

So basically, its a Sunday morning, and I got up early. Maybe 9am isn't so early, but its early lah! Last night was a total blast. I went all the way to AMK after youth meeting to get my ingredients for my chocolate chip cookie. Well it wasn't so awesome. It looked eatable, but didn't taste eatable frankly. I managed to do 2 trays, I think I should have left it in the oven for a longer time, and also, I don't have a whisk, or a mixer, I do have a blender though, but not too nice to mix ingredients inside right? So anyway, I think we need a new oven and an electric mixer. I'm going to save for em up. And when I get married, I'm going to bring them to my home =D So random eh? Anyway, thought my cookies are not so eatable, I'm still eating em no matter what. Hehe! So next week I have another chocolate chip cookie making session =D

I'm bored now actually. I haven't prepared for my tests and I have about 3 assignments unfinished. I'm kinda procrastinating a lot already. I need to get a GPA of at least 3.0 and I hope when I graduate, I'll have more than 2.8 to get into an oversea university =D Yes, I planned that. Oh well, I'm going to get doing my notes yeah, and get ready for church. Oh and did I mention, everyone at church loved my ppt slides. Aww. Hahaha.

In His Love ♥,

Krishna Veni

I haven't really got much to say these days. Pretending to be happy while deep inside I'm broken. I know the answer for all these depressions, but I'm not really seeking out my remedy. - No its not dancing. That was  just being random =D On a brighter note, I'm going to get my long awaited hard disk drive 500GB. *Smiles*. Jansen was giving me a really stupid idea, that we buy that 1 terrabyte drive and we just pa $80 each and then we take turns bringing home. LOL. Sometimes, Jansen is full of something la.

At the moment, I'm entertaining myself by watching some random videos in youtube. And I think I should get into bed now despite the 3 hour nap. Nothing productive done, as usual =(

In His Love ♥,

Krishna Veni

I definitely felt myself being all emo a bit now and then today. I wasn't really myself in the beginning of the day, but after that it was alright I guess. Certain things in school, I wasn't too pleased with, but I didn't mention anything about it. I learned that I have to give and take a few things. I'm still sorting out certain issues with myself but I think it will be over sooner than I think.

My lectures nowadays just get keep getting draggier and draggier. Sometimes I don't really feel like going for my lectures. GAH! But I don't have much of a choice right? Besides, people have high expectations of me, and I really need to motivate myself to work hard.

Someone is kinda freaking me out. And when I say it, I mean it. I really feel that person breathing down my neck now and then, and I hate my name being called. And when the person does call my name, I feel my hair standing. It feels really so creepy, and I guess its just not me feeling that way. I don't know what such a person is doing here when they should be out there, facing the world. Hais. Nevermind.

I've got tons of maths assignment, not forgetting my team building activity that I have to conduct with my group mates. It's called Helium Straw. I think we did a good job coming up with it. LOL. And I'm quite excited for tomorrow. I still miss Timmy. On and off, I kept thinking about him la. Why does it have to be him? Why not Patrick? GAH! I'm going to see if I can do my maths assignments, if not, I'm getting into bed!

In His Love ♥,

Krishna Veni